A few miles north of San Simeon, on the central California coast, we stopped to visit the Piedras Blancas elephant seal rookery, where we saw dozens of Northern Elephant Seals lounging on the beach.

At one time hunted to the brink of extinction for their rich blubber, there were fewer than 100 of these huge marine mammals when they became protected by federal law in the early 1900s. The seals have since made a terrific comeback, and today it is estimated that their population numbers 150,000. Every year they return to the same stretch of beach to calve, from about mid-December to mid-February, and they return again to molt in the early summer.

Juveniles and adult females come ashore first, sharing the beach with the weaned pups in early April, their number increasing to a maximum number of over 4000 on the two beaches adjacent to the parking area by early May. The males follow by early June.

While human beings shed hair and skin constantly, elephant seals go through a single annual molting, in which they lose an entire layer of epidermis, which is sloughed off with the hair intact. This process helps them conserve energy, and helps prevent the loss of body heat during their deep sea dives.

Elephant seals spend up to ten months a year at sea, migrating as far north as the Gulf of Alaska and south to Baja California. Their main food is squid, and they routinely dive as much as 5,000 feet below the surface, and stay submerged for anywhere from fifteen minutes to over an hour.

These are huge creatures; adult males can grow to over thirteen feet long and weigh up to 4,500 pounds. Females are much smaller, usually about ten feet long and growing to 1,500 pounds.

Elephant seals take their name from the enlarged proboscis males develop at sexual maturity, which occurs at about three to five years of age. This appendage can grow to two feet in length in a large bull.

While they are amazingly graceful in the water, on land, elephant seals are ungainly animals that propel themselves with their flippers and by throwing their bodies forward. We watched the animals as they lay atop one another in big piles, occasionally rising up to look around before dropping their heads back down again.

The males would bellow out challenges to others bulls, and every so often two would begin to spar, thumping their chests into each other, teeth flashing and mouths gaping red. But little damage is actually done, this is merely practice for the serious duels that will come during the winter breeding season, which can get very violent.

While they are fun to watch, and can look lovable, be warned that elephant seals can be dangerous. The viewing area is fenced in, both to protect the seals from human interference, and to protect careless humans who might get too close.

Years ago, before the area was fenced, we watched a couple of idiots who tried to set their toddler on top of a huge seal to get a photo. A ranger on the scene managed to stop them, and they received a citation, and no doubt, a stiff fine.

The Piedras Blancas rookery, on State Highway 1, is home to about 15,000 animals. The area is open for viewing every day of the year and there is no admission fee or reservation required. The parking lot would accommodate a small RV, but if there were many cars in the lot, a large RV would have difficulties.

Bad Nick has the same manners as an elephant seal, but he’s not nearly as cute. So we left him at home, where he wrote a new Bad Nick Blog titled Who Pays? Check it out and leave a comment.

Thought For The Day – If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.

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Back in our old hometown of Show Low, Arizona, I had a couple of good buddies who would occasionally tell me to shut up. This usually happened when I was teasing my wife or secretary about something, and teetering on that edge where one verbal misstep could lead to very bad results. I always appreciated those guys. They saved me a lot of grief over the years, and more than once I’ve wished they were along for the ride in our bus.

I think a lot of other people need someone to tell them to shut up now and then, for their own good. It amazes me how many people get themselves into dumb situations just because they can’t shut up.

Case in point – I got an e-mail from a reader who wanted me to blacklist a campground in California. As he explained it, he and his wife had a week’s reservation, and when they arrived, he noticed an Obama campaign poster in the office while he was registering. He said he is a dyed in the wool Republican, and wasted no time in telling the campground owner that she and people like her were ruining this country. One thing led to another, and they got into what apparently was quite an argument. Then he wondered why his reservation was cancelled and he was told to leave. Maybe somebody should have told him to shut up.

A couple of years ago I got a Letter to the Editor complaining about another campground, this time in the Midwest someplace. My correspondent reported that while checking in, he noticed in reading the rules on the campground’s map that firearms were not permitted. As an avid proponent of the Second Amendment, he felt it was his duty to tell the campground owner what he thought of their rules. He too was told to take it on down the road. Why did he even have to bring it up? Did he plan to sit outside his rig at the picnic table cleaning his shotgun? Maybe somebody should have told him to shut up.

We also knew a couple who were headed to Alaska, and just by chance they happened to spend their last night before crossing the border at the same campground in Washington state as another RVing couple we know who were also headed north.

The subject of not taking guns into Canada came up, and one of the men said he owned a gun, and had left it with his son while he was on the trip. The second gentleman said he too had stashed his guns someplace, but he planned to tell “those damned Canuks” what he thought of their country’s gun laws. Both wives and the other man advised him not to say anything, but some people just can’t keep quiet.

The next morning they both approached the border crossing at the same time. When the Canadian customs inspector spoke to the first couple, he noted their Texas license plates and asked if they had any firearms onboard. They told him they had left their gun at their son’s house, but that he was certainly welcome to look though their rig. He nodded, gave them a cursory inspection, and waved them on.

When the inspector asked the second fellow about firearms, he told them (in his own words, later related to me), “God, guns, and guts made America free! And if you damned Canadians had guns, you wouldn’t be answering to any damned queen!” Several hours later, his rig nearly disassembled, they told him he was free to continue on his trip. Wouldn’t it have been a lot easier to just shut up?

I learned early on as a young driver that if a police officer stopped me, not to argue. “Say yes sir, no sir,” and otherwise keep my mouth shut. It took me a couple of bad marriages to learn that same lesson at home. And I might not have learned it then, if it were not for my pals who were always ready to say “Shut up, Nick.” 

I’ll shut up now.

Thought For The Day - Four wheels move the body. Two wheels move the soul.